I have been alcohol-free since 2012. I’m not an alcoholic; I made a conscious choice to eliminate alcohol because it’s just not good for me. If you’re thinking of cutting down or cutting out alcohol, here are some reasons why—and how to navigate the hardest part: breaking the hold of habit and societal expectation.
Alcohol is Worse for ADD Brains
First off, the ADD brain piece: ADD brains are naturally predisposed to depression. Consuming a depressant is not helpful, to say the least. I found myself in the pits of despair in my drinking years. Darkness and heaviness. To be clear, I was never a heavy drinker (well, once I got past the teen binge drinking years), but I was a regular drinker, having 1-3 drinks multiple times per week.
Alcohol Messes with Your Sleep
Drinking can help put you to sleep. It’s a sedative. Many people practice the glass of wine in the evening protocol to wind down. However, the alcohol disrupts sleep architecture. While it helps with the initial falling asleep part, there is a rebound effect after your body processes the alcohol. This can leave you wide awake somewhere in the 1-4 a.m. range, and subsequently compromise your REM sleep for the rest of the night.
This is why you can have only 1-2 drinks and still feel groggy upon waking and tired throughout the day. This was a big reason that I quit. I like to be my best throughout the day, and it wasn’t worth 1-2 drinks at night to torpedo the quality of the next day.
Who Needs Alcohol, Really?
Sure, wine and beer and spirits are great. You can nerd out on origin stories and rare bottles and myriad flavor profiles. That’s cool and fun. But I would say that for feeling good, nothing beats being fully healthy and energized and clear-minded. Alcohol may offer feelings of invincibility or reduce social awkwardness, facilitate straight talk, but at what cost? And isn’t it more empowering to reach those mental and emotional states on your own through exercise and mindfulness, self-awareness and self-care, and courage?
The Hard Part: The First 90 Days
The hardest part for me was those first few months. It’s an identity shift and a habit to break.
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The Identity: From drinker to non-drinker. I had to tell myself that. “I am a non-drinker.” And I had to believe it. Or at least start to get my mind around it.
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The Habit: “A beer would taste good right now after a long work day. Take the edge off.” I weaned myself off with other “special drinks.” Kombucha was a good bridge for me. Fermented beverage, crafted with stories and a variety of ingredients like alcoholic beverages. And I could bring them to parties and have something to sip on so I didn’t feel out of place. Grabbing a beer from the fridge on a hot day. Meeting friends for drinks. A glass of wine with dinner. We are mammals and creatures of habit. Breaking habits takes mindfulness and intention. Finding substitutes and replacements helps. Keeping alcohol out of the house makes it easier.
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The Social Pressure: “Are others watching me and wondering why I’m not drinking? What do they think of me?” And people did ask. Especially people that I’d always shared drinks with. “You’re not drinking? Whoah!” “Why are you not drinking?” It felt like pressure to me and I felt very self-conscious for a few months. I think I got over the hump when all of the main people I socialized with accepted that I was alcohol-free, stopped offering me booze, and stopped questioning me. It took some resolve. Every month got easier until it became an identity and the new default. “Non-drinker” went from an aspirational state to a grounded one.
So Worth It!
Clear-mindedness. Consistent energy. No hangovers or dehydration. Plus, for me, I felt like I was setting a good example for my kids. Neither of them are drinkers. They don’t find value in it and would rather be sober. And think of all the money you can save when beer, wine, and spirits are not part of the budget! Especially drinks out at restaurants and bars.
I am fully me, all day every day, under the influence of nothing. I loved much of my time as a drinker. I enjoyed fine wines and craft beers and spirits. Being pleasantly buzzed with friends. But I’ve had my lifetime quota, and I’m OK with that.
My alcohol-free journey includes managing my nervous system with daily practices. Check out my free interactive nervous system regulation guide:
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